A Note on Getting Shot Down

"You are the bride! It's your wedding, do what you want!"

I don't know about you, but I've heard this about a million times during my year of wedding planning, and I definitely think there is this culture in the wedding industry that the wedding is totally and completely all about the bride all the time. By the time I got engaged, this idea had pretty much infiltrated my brain. It didn't help that I practically had the entire wedding planned out in my head within moments of saying yes!

So when I started bringing my ideas for the wedding to Mr Elk and Mama Elk, it took me by total surprise how often my ideas were shot down. At first, I can't lie, I was pretty annoyed. I was still in this mind frame that it's my wedding and I should get whatever I want. It didn't take long, though, for me to realize how dumb I was being. This isn't just my wedding! If it was MY wedding, I'd be marrying myself! The wedding is to celebrate my relationship with Mr. Elk and the beginning of the rest of our lives together. Of course I need his input! And moreover, I am Mama Elk's only daughter, and her and Papa Elk are footing a lot of the bill (because they want to!). She so desperately wants to be a part of the planning process to spend time with me. In a way, it is her wedding too (well, the party at least).

The biggest example of getting shot down is something I've already discussed with you- having our pooch at the wedding. Mr Elk and Mama Elk are both equally adamant that this NOT happen. I'm not thrilled about being shot down on this one, but recognize that its just not going to happen.

The pooch looking dapper in his bowtie. (This picture is part of the compromise we've made to include the pooch in the wedding- we'll get back to this eventually)

I'm glad I realized how silly I was being, and I'm now able to be shot down gracefully without getting too upset. It is also a testament to my relationship with Mr. Elk that we can compromise on a lot of these details we don't necessarily agree on.

Have you been shot down during the planning process? How have you dealt with it?